Kuthunga ejaman kuthunga..

Ulagathula upper heirarchy-la iruka yarkume en nilamai varave koodadhu. Adhuvum smart-a irundhu, than smart-nu therinju over-smart-a nadandhukara makkal-ku upper level-la varave koodadhu, vandha mandai dhan kaayum, seekiram BP-um egirum.

I have such a person called Ms. Cashew reporting to me here, and daily enaku eod-la tension erardhudhan jasthiya nadakum velai nadakkaradha vida. As it is, naamale kavalai pattundrupom ennada indha issue iruke-nu, and we'd be doing something about it, thideernu ammani varuvanga..

"Hey, so what are we doing about this?"

(pillayar-ku thenga udaikaradha vendikitirukom, vera edhavadhu solution iruka?)"I have already mentioned this to the higher-ups"

"See, this is what will happen" (takes out all possible tools like pen/notepad/paper and explains for 15 minutes)

(Oho appadiya, enaku theriyave theriyadhe, naan ithanai naal thoongitu-la irundhen?!) "Yeah, you are right, we are going to discuss about this"

"We can't proceed with this absurd data" (again proceeds to explain the same thing in a different angle)

(Ammani, enaku theriyum, romba kadupethadheenga) "Correct ma'am, we know this, and this is what we are going to try to solve"

"Why don't you send a mail to so-and-so asking when we are going to address this?"

(Arambichuttanga pa krishna paramathma upadesam panradhuku) "Yeah, I have done that"

"Have you copied me?"

(Aama, ivanga Queen Elizabeth, naatla nadakara athanai vishayathayum ivanga kadhula podanum) "Nopes, but I will forward the mail to you"

"Ok, again ...." (starts rattling off with another issue which we have been speaking for so looong)

Next scene: A meeting with stakeholders

Stakeholder<#>: So what are you planning for this?

Me: Well_

Ms. Cashew: Blah blah blah

Me: (Inga yaaru yaarai lead panranga?)

Stakeholder<#>: In your experience, what do you think about ?

Me: It_

Ms. Cashew: In the previous projects, blah blah blah

Me: (?!!! Ammani, avar enkitta kettar)

Stakeholder<#>: So, how is this going to be done?

Me: _ (not even a word out)

Ms. Cashew: Blah blah (Talks about a totally different thing, and that guy listens to it like a manga too)

Me: I think the question was this, and this<> is the answer to it.

(both of them come to reality, kashtam da iraiva!)

Ippadidhan oru kodumai daily nadakudhu, and since this lady bubbles with hyperactiveness everyday, I dont want to spoil her enthu in work by saying something harsh, so I let her kiddishness go. She comes everyday to me, sits for 30 mins and talks abt her veerapradhabangal in other projects and in offshore, and my duty is to give all-ears to her and send my brains elsewhere. So yeah, niraya perku thonalam, en ivalo idam kodukanum-nu, but I dont want to give fundas here, it is simply "Adara maatai adi karakanum" and she's just a year old in her career, she'll learn soon. Indha attitude kooda en-na, this is how I was in the beginning of my career (ofcourse, minus those veerapradhabangal coz I wasnt comfortable sitting at anyone's place talking about anything, be it work or personal, in length), and my managers encouraged me in my work (not that cashew behavior) and I realized as I grew what my mistakes were. So I hope she'd do the same too.

Aana adhukaga, enkittaye vandhu "Do this, do that"-nra!!!

"Kuthunga ejaman kuthunga, indha Cashew kootame ippadidhan!!!!" :(((

Meesai naraithalum...

There is this place called Paddy's Market near my apartment, and it is famous for the fact that you get everything there. So naamum Paddy's market parkalame-nu anga ponom. And as rightly described, adhu ellam kidaikara Ranganathan Street madhiridhan irundhadhu.

I got myself a belt (as my poor little fancy belt lost its fastener when I had been to the Great Barrier Reef) and then proceeded to the other parts of the market. Oru idathula Chinese style salwars vithundha oru lady, it looked nice with its collar and fancy fasteners. Seri ok, naama try pannalame-nu onnu try pannen -

First try:

The lady came inside the cloakroom to help me with fastening and said "You are tall and slim"

(Kaduppana sarcasm) "Does that matter? Won't this dress look good if I am tall and slim?"

"No no, I have seen a lot of girls who are tall and slim and this dress has been beautiful on them"

'Appadi vaa vazhiku, mmkm (namma oor ladies mogavai kattai idikaradhai imagine pannikonga)'

We came out and she commented on the alterations along with an old guy, presumably her husband, who was the tailor there - censor censor censor, namakkedhuku andha trivialities ellam..

So the first try went like this, and it was a bit loose, so she suggested a smaller size (enna panradhu, Australia-la mega size kooda vachirukanga)

Again, I went in and tried a green one (the previous one was a brown), and it fit well. Velila vandhu nindha, indha kizhavan solran "Wow, it fits perfectly, it is beautiful"

'Kizhava, un vayasuku ippadi nee kevalama look vittutu solla koodadhu'

"You have a great body "

'?!!!!'

"Your husband is so lucky"

'Seruppala adi, my husband lucky-a illaya-nu nee ennada solradhu? Vayasache, vayasuketha madhiri pesuvom-nu edhavadhu iruka? $*^$&#^%^#@%#$&'

And then came the worst, indha kizhavan edhayo alter pannanum-nu kai ellam mela vaikaran bastard! I was trying to avoid that, and thankfully that lady came and took over the alteration discussion..anyways, will all these unpleasant interactions, I decided I dont want the dress after all (Sigh! the dress was nice anways, if not for this damned old man!)

I have heard some girls' remarks, ofcourse I think the same too, that some old men are worse than youngsters. Youngsters atleast dont cross a certain limit, sight adipanga, avangalukulla pesipanga, but they dont come and cross your personal space. But these old men, having the age advantage, try touching young girls and comment happily on them. This is the first unpleasant experience for me in Australia, it had all been good till Sunday. :(

Idhudhan Mahabharatha kadhai..

Idhudhan inga nadakkudhu indha project-la :)) For those who cannot understand the analogy, the coffee-table is the software, Mom is the dev team and Calvin is obviously the testing team. Pottu pallai pekkaranga testing team-la, and the dev-team is having their hands on their erudite(?!) heads. Avanga bug raise panvangalam, ivanga reject panvangalam, illana ivanga bug illa feature-nuvangalam (as the entire IT dev world does), avanga othuka matten-nuvangalam..Inna nadakudhu inga?

Idhula mathi mathi nakkal vera:

Testing engg: Kodumai padutharanga dev team-la, bug raise panna inimel dhan padichu ivanga fix pannanum poliruku..ivanga eppo padichu, eppo fix panni...(paavam dev team)

Dev engg: Che che, adhellam bug-e kidayadhu, edho testing team-ku velai tharanume-nu naangale bugs introduce pannirukom! (Nakkal?!)

Enaku therinju indha pavam category client dhan, indha nakkal-kellam serthu paisa tharanga..hmm!!

Adutha veetu blog..

It is only after I came here to Australia that I started blog-hopping and blogging too. It all started when I received a forward on a post written on a blog, and I visited that blog and read through the entire blog (velai vetti illadhavangaluku idhellam sagajamappa!!) and then wondered why I shouldn't blog my thoughts or whatever crap it is..adhanala naanum rendu arambichen (again no velais, only vettis)

Ok, talking about blog-hopping, enaku onnu puriyala, I dont see any meaningful content in half of those blogs that are widely read (no poramai tags, nijamma solren). And half of them contain statements that humble illiterate folks like me don't understand :( I want to understand if a blog means you write whatever you want, or you write whatever you want with humor, or you write what you think would interest others, or you vent out! What do I write? I write coz I want these Australian experiences should remain recorded somewhere for me to laugh at them a few years later..And indha blog-hoppers leave comments too. Some blogs have some solid content, either hilarious or informative, and I appreciate that.
(Manasatchi: Ok, who cares if Usha appreciates it or not?!
Usha: Ippo indha kelvi romba avasiyama?)
Aana onnu, I perfectly understand that this is entertainment, blogging something helps you in venting out and gives an immense satisfaction that you have written something to the net, whether someone reads it or not :)

Ninaipadhellam nadandhuvittal...

So kadaiseela outing is cancelled!!

En pakathu cube Australian kitta forecast kettu, website ellam browse pannadhan theriyudhu nalaiku thunderstorms expected-nu..so oru mail anuppitten ellarukum, that we cant have an outing-nu.

Adadada, ovvoruthan/i mugathaiyum parkanume, evalo hidden sandosham, 'Thank God weekend pozhachudhu-nu', idhula andha starter payan solran (adhavadhu avar sogama kattikararam enkitta) 'Yeah we cant have it, lets move it to next weekend as you said'. Ada mangas, next weekend ennoda team-ku work irundha naanga enna panradhu?

Innoruthan 'Thank you'-nan, ennadhu-nu kettadhuku 'Illa, adutha varam schedule pannirukeengale adhuku'- avar samalikararam situation-a.. Enna nakkala, nalla theriyudhuda unnoda sandosham indha weekend pozhaichudhu-nu.

Next day: Super-a veyil kaayudhu, it was such a lovely day :)) We could have as well had the outing. Nalaiku andha David-a vachukaren naan..

Aduthathu Ambujathai parthela...

Evano engayo Melbourne-la team-activity panni appreciation vangi photo ellam release pantan-nradhukaga, inga ava-avan (coz both the genders are involved) naamalum Team-Activity nadathi "movie" anupanum off-shore-ku ore amarkalam..

Seri-nu resource manager-um othuntu naalum kuricha, yaar kitendhum endha moochum kaanom!! Ada pavingala, appo Saturday enna panradhu? Edho place mattum decide pantanga, avalodhan, adhukaga anga poi samaikava mudiyum? And can we show that as team-building??

Seri, naama edhavadhu initiate panvom-nu, I spoke to the folks asking them to contribute with ideas, and then sent a mail with a starter idea. Avlodhan, adhukappuram no mooch!! Just 1.5 days to go, and the manager sends a mail "By mid-day t'row I need the list of activities"-nu, appovavadhu edhavadhu surusurupu?? Mmmhmmm!!! Interest illadhavan ellam edhuku kekkareenga outing ellam?!

So, I sent a mail to people asking for a meet for just 30 mins to come up with the list, dheiva piravigal, othuntanga. Now to the meet:

Me(to the guy who started all this, hereon the starter): Hey, so suggest an activity first, since you wanted all this..

Starter: Hey, c'mon, I suggested the place, I gave the train timetable, I have done my part (SO?? paavi, naama enna role assignment-a panrom?)

Me: But that doesn't mean you dont suggest anything!!

Starter: Frankly, I have never been to any team-building activity, so I dont know..I just thought we can have some team dinner (??!!!)

Me: And you would send that video to Melbourne?!!

(laugh laugh laugh, ennoda vayitherichal ivangalukellam siripa varudham)

Girl1: We can have a marketing game, where we can sell our dept to the moderator

Me: Can you put it down in some words and send it to me, so I can add it to the list with description?

Girl1: Hey no, I dont know the game, I just suggested something (appuram edhuku solra paruppu madhiri?)

Girl2: It goes like this, you try selling your dept to an external customer, blah blah...(dheiva piravi, kapathiniye kadaiseela)

Me: Ok, I understand, anything else we can do?

Girl3: Treasure hunt!!

Me: Is that ok with this small number?

Girl2: Yeah, we can split into two teams, and each team hides something related to the domain and challenge the other team to find it out (idhu per treasure hunt-a?, kashtam! But ofcourse, interesting tweaking-adhan iruku)

Me: Yeah cool, that should do.

Starter: How about the weather? If it is cloudy like this, then I'd rather want to sleep at home (seruppaladi! mavane, kekkaradhayum kettutu thoonga vera poraya nee?)

Me: See, the only exception would be rains where we all can call this off, but any other weather, you all have your jackets, dont you? (endhudhan naan tholaichutten :()

Everyone: Yeah yeah

Me: We can also have some story developing, which should be hilarious blah blah

Everyone: Yeah, we can

Me: Ok, folks, I'll send a mail listing the activities

And we dispersed, enaku kadupana kadupu, no one seemed to have the enthu, appuram enya kekkareeenga?? mangas! Innoruthi iruka vera project-la, she wanted this so badly, but when it came to planning, she cool-ly said you guys decide and keep me posted. Mathavan nerupula kulir kayaradhu-la kushi vera!!!

Anyways, iniku mazhai peyyudhu, nalaiku illa-na we are having this, illana happily call-it-off!!

Iravinil attam...Pagalinil ottam..

Australians have a nice culture, that's what I think. Namma oorla, people earn, earn and keep on earning for getting a house, for their families, for luxury...the list keeps growing. But here, people have but a single policy, earn to spend. Kaalaila ellam nalla work pantu, evening aana udane you can see them hanging around in restaurants with wine/beer eating something, be it ladies or gents. "Vaazhkai vazhvadharke" appadinra policy correct-a follow panradhu-na adhu Australians dhan. You can almost every restaurant filled up here in the evenings..

Adhuvum paarunga, US, Indian youngsters madhiri ivanga pencil thin-a irukardhudhan azhagu-ntellam ninaikardhilla..chumma saapadai vettu vettu vettu-nu vetti nalla kozhuk mozhuk-nu irukanga! But indha old ladies adikara koothudhan thanga mudiyala, adhan skin ellam wrinkled-a iruke, konjam over-a sadhai pottutome, adaka odukama dress pottupom - adhellam kidayadhu...shorts enna skirt enna, low cut enna sleeveless enna jamaikaranga! Hmmm...naamadhan edho formals pottutu chamatha office poitu varom :( Oru skirt pottuta porum, kooda iruka Indian pasanga ellam "Enna Australian-nu ninaipa"-nu nakkal...ada paavingala, naan enna miniskirt-a potruken, edho long-a dhane pottutu sutharen!!!

Sydney-il sirapu Diwali!

Iniku I am super-jobless amidst meetings and discussing with teammembers, so ennoda atramaiya innum velipaduthalam-nu vanten.

The day I came here was a week ahead of Diwali, so vandha udane enna pannen surusurupa discussed with people on celebrating Diwali at client's place. Appuram oru mail utten elarukum, dhayavu senju informals-la vanga Diwali day aniku-nu. Adhuku oru thittu kidaichudhu paarunga guys kiterndhu, hayyooo, they all were saying "You girls are jobless, you will bring salwars and saris, what will we do? We can wear only formals" adhu idhu-nu kathal. Parvallapa, mudiyalana vitrunga-nu oru vellai kodi kattitu vittuten.

Then started the preps for Diwali, plans for Rangoli, mehndi etc. When we were browsing for Rangoli designs (engal-la yarkume Rangoli theriyadhe :D) one client dude walked in and saw those patterns and said they look amazing. Appuram dhan therinjudhu avan enna range-la irukan-nu, namma oorla dot pottu zig zag-la line viduvume basic design, adhaye avan "This is awesome, it must have taken 12 mths to practise"-nan!!! Adannkokka makka, adhu kuzhandai kooda podumda enga oorla!

Adutha kodumai Mehndi, ennada North Indian ponnunga ellam irukangale, mehndi nalla varum-nu partha....oruthi-ku kooda theriyadham!!! So midnight-la utkarndhu poda theriyadha naan Mehndi potten-na parthukonga "Necessity is the mother of invention"-nra ariya thathuvathai!! Thonina madhiri ellam varainjindhen :(

Then came the day, edho kokku makka oru design rangoli-la potta, adhai padam edukaranga, namma Australian vazh nanmakkal ellam!!! namma oorla kaalkasu peradhu adhu! Pottu-ku andha alai alaiyaranga ladies ellam! Namma oor sweet ellam nalla vettitu kelvi vera, when is the next Indian function-nu...vaangakka, naanga pottute irukom, neenga saptute irunga-nu ninaichitte "he he he"-nu sirichuttu vandhen.

Namma ooru singari...

Edho nimmadhiya India-a kuppai kottindha ennai Australia anupitanga, but ofcourse, even I wanted to travel. But only after I came here, I realized the transformations I have to undergo. Avan avan vai-la kozhukattaiya vachindu pesaranunga!!! Especially my manager! I could understand atleast 75% of whatever others spoke, but this guy, yabba, mothathaiyum vaikullaye pesikaran! Naan patuku Baa-nu parka vendi iruku avanai. Ok, that was the first day..

Idhula innoru tragedy enna-na, I didnt undergo the cross-cultural training. So whenever I dont understand what he speaks, I do a "umm" and try grasping what he wants to know...idhai avanunga thappa edunthuntanga. So one day, when this guy came and asked me if things are ok, I did a "umm" to register it completely, and then said "yeah things are fine but"..avlodhan ivan innoruthanai parthu sirikaran, avan ennada-na "We are getting used to it, you say 'Yeah, things are great!' and then continue with 'Umm, but there is something...'" Idhu ennangada akramama iruku, naan umm sonnadhu firstla, adhai en mid-sentence-ku cut paste panni interpret panreenga????

Yet another day, I had some doubts (well, I am an inquisitive person, and I keep having questions) but little did I know that I cant use the same "doubt" term here, but should be using "questions" instead. Naan pattuku romba surusurupa poi "I have a few doubts" appadinu soltu, ellam kettundappuram, indha manager solran "You shdnt say doubts coz that gives an impression that you are doubting the design or the person, say I have a couple of questions" :((((

Namma ooru Singari Sydney pakkam vandhalam
pei muzhi muzhichikinu ninnalam

-nra kadhaiya aayiduchu en nilamai! Edho ippolam puriyudhu enna pesaran-nu, naanga lip reading, kadhula receptor equipment enhancement ellam panni oru range-ku vantomla!